Friendship · Life · Relationships

Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder 💜

It’s Thanksgiving week, time of year where we all should be remembering if not on a daily basis, surely during this week what we’re thankful for. First let me start by saying I’m extremely thankful for the life that my God is blessed me with. It has not been perfect, but I am thankful. I am employed, I have healthy children, a roof over our head, a vehicle to drive, friends who love and care about me, and lastly a family who love and care for me. Unfortunately I have seen many social media post where people can’t exactly share or celebrate the same things as I. So it was important to me that I acknowledge these things before God and remain humble and thankful for them.

Wasn’t real sure how to approach this blog but something has been weighing heavy on my mind. I consider myself an attentive person. I know genuine people. I can feel a person who is filled with positive energy, a loving spirit and compassion. On the flip side I pick up on tension very easily, and I also can sense if someone is dealing with an issue, when negative energy is around, or if people overall just being shady. I sincerely with all my heart believe that God has given me the spirit of discernment. I am certainly not perfect, and don’t claim to be a saint but my senses have never steered me wrong and has always revealed people’s true intentions.

A friend of mine posted a meme on her Facebook page and it read;

Respect is earned
Honesty is appreciated
Trust is gained
And loyalty is returned

Let me tell you, when I read it, it prompted to start this blog post. It’s been something I need to get off my chest and that’s been bothering me for the last couple of days. Lately I feel as if people, friends, and family have been revealing themselves to me in various ways. I think I’m a very honest person and if you rub me wrong you’re going to know with no hesitation, and after doing so I will remove myself from that situation. I don’t see the point in keeping up mess. I no longer become interested in how or why, but just that I need to protect myself from negative people and their energy. I’m not an individual, as in a selfish person. I do have a good solid circle of friends, however, I would be remiss if I did not say that friendships don’t make or break me (as in my identity or life). Furthermore if you consider yourself my friend and something does not seem right with family or “our friends” or the circle of which we are a part of, then I feel I need to hold you accountable as well. Much like that meme I read earlier, my friendship is based on those same values, all of which I promised to give in return loyalty, respect and honesty.

If I have to question your intentions, or your honesty then we’re really not friends more like two people that know each other. If I have considered you a friend and I have to question your loyalty I will politely remove myself from the situation. Too many times we become so involved and in tune with ourselves, that we fail to realize how we make others feel, and we’re not cognizant of how our actions are perceived. This is something I’ve learned a few years ago to always treat people the way I would want to be treated. To take a step back and look at my actions, and if anything about it seems shady or can be perceived in shadeful way then I re-evaluate my approach to things and try to do better. Now if you’ve completely burned your bridge with me ie..being disrespectful, someone who can’t be trusted or have violated basic friendship etiquette, I don’t know how to bring you back but regardless I will always remain cordial.

I am aware and fully understand that everybody doesn’t think the same way I do, and I do not expect everyone to be cognizant of other people’s feelings. However I can remove and WILL remove myself from “your circle”. A defense mechanism I use to protect my energy and space. God is still working on me, and in the meantime I have to let you be. People appreciate you more by experiencing you absence..

In honor of this holiday I shall remain thankful for everybody and everything that contributed to my well-being. I do know that people come into your life for reasons and seasons and I’m thankful overall.

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